


A Matter of Time

by starhawk2005



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Gen Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-08
Updated: 2012-09-08
Packaged: 2017-11-13 20:11:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/507287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starhawk2005/pseuds/starhawk2005
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's too late.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Matter of Time

“I came back for _you_ ,” I say, reaching down for her hand.

But my fingers slide across a circlet of hard metal. Somewhere inside myself, I freeze up.

No, I wasn’t gone that long. It can’t be- 

But it is. Gwen rattles on about Rhys and how nobody else will have her, while I fight a battle within myself.

No matter how long I’ve spent time-hopping, a large part of me still has a 51st century mentality. That part wants me to tell her to be with me, no matter the cost. Lie to Rhys, or dump Rhys, or sleep with both of us, it doesn’t matter to the future-oriented part of me. 

Ianto will accept it, or he won’t, but at that precise moment, it doesn’t matter to me. More likely he’ll accept it, because he knows me. He has his flaws, but a lack of understanding of me and my way-ahead-of-the-times ways isn’t one of them. Besides, that was always one of the good things about loving many people at once – no one lover has to be ‘perfect’. Ianto’s flawed, but so is Gwen. So am I.

But I’m not flawed enough to blind myself to the problem: I’ve been living in this time long enough to realize the selfishness of trying to take Gwen for myself. She’s a 21st century person, the kind of woman who wants a husband, a fairytale wedding, two children and a dog. She slept with Owen, yes, so she’s certainly had issues in her relationship with Rhys before, but who _hasn’t_? I’m certainly not one to judge. And it doesn’t mean she’ll be willing to drop everything else to be with me, nor share me with anyone else.

So, as much as I want to crush her to me, kiss her deeply, and coax the ring from her finger, I don’t. I give her a quick hug and a peck on the cheek instead, and with as sincere a congratulations as I can fake, I then beat a quick retreat.

I love her – love them _all_ – and even if, back in my day (so to speak), that could mean more than just a working relationship, with some or even all of them, I know most of them aren’t ready for that. I’ve never been one to follow the rules, but even I have to acknowledge that sometimes it’s better not to mess with the established order.

Bottom line is, Torchwood is more important, the _Doctor_ is more important, than my need to have many people in my life, both sexually and romantically. I have to hold to that, because that’s why I’m here. Waiting.


End file.
